Hopefully Helpful

I’ve received phone calls, emails, and messages from friends embarking on food journeys. Some have to give up gluten, others dairy; some are just trying to make some positive life changes where food is involved.

I remember a bit too vividly last May when we started what I consider our whole new life where food is concerned. I felt like I was in a blender spinning high speed, and I was hungry. To be entirely honest, the first 8-12 months were mind-numbing, stressful, and just kind of a hanging-on-for-dear-life experience. I really don’t want that for anyone else.

That being said, I will offer my two cents on ways to survive and then some resources we found hugely helpful. Remember, our journey was not standard; we were definitely not in the worst place someone can be, but the extreme way Celiac attacked Wren’s system put us in a much worse place than most. There’s nothing to say you will suffer for a year, or even months.

Advice:

 Take some time, alone. There are TONS of resources for whatever food issue you’re dealing with. The best first step is to take your laptop away from all distractions and dedicate a whole day to locating helpful resources. I did not do this; it was a bad decision. There’s no reason to just barely survive when there are others who have done it before and can help you.

 Rally support. Other people may not be going through the same thing, but that doesn’t mean close friends and family can’t be great resources or help. Have others keep their eyes and ears peeled for resources that can help you along, and see if someone wants to buddy up and go through the journey with you.

 Feel free to screw up. Everything we’ve cooked has not been a masterpiece medley of goodness on our taste buds. That’s okay. You are learning to cook again in a whole new way.

Here are a few resources I look at regularly. We eat Paleo about 90% of the time, so most of these sites cater to that. Be sure to read each recipe as every person contributing recipes has their preferences; some are absolutely no dairy and some use butter on occasion. Some sites are gluten-free and others are gluten-free in 90% of their recipes.

Resources:

Health Bent-Great recipes, and most are dairy optional meaning there is usually a non-dairy option for people like us who don't consume it.

PaleOMG-Hilarious as well as delicious.

Everyday Paleo-Great dinners, the first Paleo website we found and the author of the first Paleo cookbook we purchased.

Elana's Pantry-When we want bread, we make the almond bread.  Yum!  I have also convinced my kids to eat the spinach casserole.  They thought it was a dessert!

What Runs Lori-She has a recipe for Knock-Off Hail Mary Chocolate Macaroons.  I made them last night.  I ate 13.  I don't even feel remotely bad about it.

Food Renegade-Great recipes and advice on nutrition.

Mark's Daily Apple-There are always recipes and great information on this site.  Read the apple everyday!

The Food Lovers Kitchen-So many of these recipes are staples for us now that I can't remember how we ate before my friend introduced me to this site.

If you are on a food journey or have recommendations for people with special diets, please comment.  The more resources, the better!

Update on the Boobs

Amy’s thermogram came back. It was not good, and it was not bad. It was troublesome in the sense that heat was definitely picked up in the boob region, both sides, and you don’t want heat on a thermogram because heat means inflammation and inflammation means ripe for invasion. The last two years of my re-education about how the body works have led to this: inflammation is bad.


The good news side is this: Amy’s 29 and has this knowledge. She is following up with blood work to check hormone levels and then will work with the same woman who did the thermogram to figure out what needs to be done to decrease inflammation. Diet, exercise (she’s already kind of doing this since she runs about 1,000 miles a week), supplements, decrease in stress, increase in sleep, chiropractics, all these are options. There’s no sitting and waiting. This is a very do kind of diagnosis. I like those; I’m a bit of a doer, waiting being the thing I do when all other options are gone.

Preventative care is what this is, and I’m still amazed at how as medically advanced as our country is supposed to be that we don’t actually practice preventative care much at all. Insurance companies in no way I have seen support preventative care. Most doctors do not preach it or even seem to know much about it. It seems the way we usually do it is wait till illness strikes and then treat symptoms as opposed to root causes. It is so tremendously backwards, and for my sister it could have meant breast cancer in the not so distant future.


So let Amy and everyone trying to jump on health issues before they get jumped on serve as an example. It is worth the cost (I can say that as someone who has paid right around fifteen hundred dollars out of pocket since June just to try to heal Wren and prevent her from a host of other ugly problems that want to attack her because of Celiac being a stupid auto-immune disease). God has provided all we’ve needed, and we’ve been willing to prioritize needs over wants as a show of gratefulness for the healing and His provisions. While you’re at it, let’s rally for an overhaul in how health is viewed in this country. Let’s start some proactive instead of reactive behavior. Let’s raise kids who make healthy choices, choices they were taught by their parents and members of society who said, “yes, you’re worth it.” If enough of us get on board, who knows what is possible? I’d like to find out.

Update on Santa from Sammy

We already have donations coming in! I wanted to also let everyone know that another drop off point is available in Tyler at my step-sister’s apartment. Let me know if you need the information, and thank you to everyone who has helped spread the word and donated!

Santa from Sammy Christmas

If you have met me in the last two years, you know I have a son who almost died of pneumonia. The picture above is on the day we finally left the hospital, and I love it because Sammy looks so calm.  The previous days were not calm.  They were a fight, and no one knew how they were going to turn out.

It’s hard to even write about that time in our lives because I now have an almost two-year-old who spends his days in his big boy undies jumping off the coffee table, but the truth of it never leaves. The truth of it also makes it hard this time of year. Sammy was born on December 21st, he was admitted to Children’s in Plano December 30th, and we didn’t leave until January. It was eleven days total, it felt like a year, and New Year’s will forever be my least favorite holiday EVER.

Still, we were blessed for sure. There’s a plan for Sammy’s life that did not include him dying of pneumonia at ten-days-old, and I am grateful for it. I am also grateful for the people God led us to at Children’s who took care of my child like he was their own. For just under two years I’ve been thinking that we really need to find a way to thank those people and help other children and families going through the same thing. I’m just slightly behind.

So, this year we’re going to collect items from the Children’s wish list for the kids in the hospital at Children’s at Legacy in Plano over Christmas. Santa makes his rounds at Children’s on Christmas Eve, and we want to make sure his bag is full! We’re also going to collect packaged food for the staff who works the holidays. The sweet lady I spoke to in the Children’s Life Department said she has seen the staff, “Go crazy for food.” Another reason these are my kind of people.

Here are the top wish list items for Christmas:

 Coloring books and crayons

 Infant and toddler toys (they love the ones that light up and play music, but any are great)

 New stuffed animals with the tags on

 DVDs, new or used

 Books

 Stickers

The staff accepts any packaged food you feel like buying.

We have three drop off points: Our house for people in the Dallas/Fort Worth area (we’re in Frisco), my Dad and stepmom’s house in Athens and my sister’s house in Athens. We will be accepting donations in Athens until November 22nd and donations in Frisco until December 19th. Email me or use the comments on Facebook or the blog, and I’ll get you drop off addresses and times.

Donations will be delivered to Children’s December 20th by Dennis and me. If you feel led to help, please do. Whether you do or not, please pray for those who are not well, and please especially pray for the children, families, and medical staff who are affected by or taking care of a sick child.

The Hard Stuff

My friends and I met a nanny at the park during our weekly playdate Monday. She had a set of twins and two two-year-olds. None of them cried, puked, ran around crazy, and she looked completely unstressed. Obviously, we had to pick this woman’s brain.

After pelting her with questions for around three hours, the playdate mommies and I discovered we may be the only people in our zip code raising our kids without assistance from a paid helper. She could work 24/7 if she chose since she is both a day and a night nanny(yeah, night nannies stay up with kids so parents can sleep. That’s why some moms come to the library with color coordinated outfits, lipstick, and highlighted hair and I show up with one of my kids’ underwear sticking to my shirt because of static cling. I also don’t wear makeup and went three days without brushing my hair once because I forgot. Yes, forgot. I don’t look in mirrors much). She has had clients who she night nannies for and then turns them over to a day nanny, never seeing the parents except when she is interviewed.

This affirms a story one of my friends told me about a mom in her son’s swim class who brings her nanny along to the lessons because a) she refuses to change her child’s diaper, b) she refuses to change his clothes, and c) she refuses to feed him herself. She basically jumps in the pool, splashes around and then hands him to someone else.

I’m still having a hard time believing this stuff really exists. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve known for a long time that our family set up camp in a community we don’t have a ton in common with. It doesn’t mean the people aren’t nice, and we love that there are tons of families around, but we know we’re strange in the don’t-like-to-buy-things, don’t-care-if my-kid-goes- to-Harvard-or- plays-sports (and the sports one can get you shot), still-breastfeeding-my-almost- two-year-old, wear-children’s-underwear-to-the-library-on-the-outside-of-my-clothes kind of way. However, the nanny thing confirmed it: we are in a foreign land. Or maybe this is a widespread thing. I’m really not sure.

The sadness I feel about this whole situation is not in being left out. I have met equally odd individuals, like the ladies I was at the park with, and we’re forming our own community within whatever this other mess is. I just feel bad for the parents who aren’t changing diapers, feeding babies, staying up all night because someone needs you to; all this stuff is good. It’s where the relationships are built. Some of it is frustrating and gross, but it’s wonderful and sweet, and there is so much blackmail that comes from it to be used when your children sass you as teenagers. I wouldn’t want to miss a second and just jump in on the “easy” parts of parenting, if there are any. The messy and the crazy are where I think we’ve all learned the most about each other. And let me tell you, if you want to know someone, spend a ton of time with them when they’re sleep deprived. The four of us have information on each other we will have to take to the grave (or I’ll blog about what I know if antagonized). The inside jokes, the meltdowns, the little things about people’s personalities, it’s all there in the everyday, but you have to be there for it. Those crazy parents with full-time nannies and their uninterrupted sleep; just give me the wrinkles that come with sleep deprivation and I’ll be good to go. I get the moments to go with the wrinkles, so it’s worth it.

Fillmore

We fish sat for a sweet friend. Fillmore the fish served as further evidence of why we do not need fish. For example:

They eat gluten which means after feeding Fillmore, I had to scrub down and place his food out of reach of everyone. The kids weren’t allowed to feed him because before I can utter, “don’t put your hands in your mouth” they are swallowing their arms.

Fish don’t freak out when you don’t feed them. Kids do. Or my kids say passive aggressive things like, “you can make me eggs now” or “what are you eating?” which is code for “because if it sounds good I’m going to eat it and you’re going to wonder why you never get lunch later in the day when you’re starving.” Anyway, during my morning conversations with Fillmore, he never mentioned that he had not been fed breakfast, so let’s just all thank the Lord he survived.


There’s a lot of guilt involved with fish. It’s a fish. You can’t walk it or hold it or “take it out of the bowl to pet” as Wren kept asking to do. Yet, I still felt guilty just sort of leaving him on the counter, periodically feeding him, chatting it up with him while I loaded the dishwater and then forgetting about him for pretty much the rest of the day. My friend said her son does tricks for him and shows him all his toys and just generally hangs out with him. I think I may not be that much of a giver. Fish don’t even smile, so I am not tap dancing for half an hour so Fillmore can continue to swim around looking bored.


Fish always look depressed, or at least they do when they’re with us. This is the second time Dennis and I have ventured into the arena of fish sitting, and the first fish literally almost died of depression. We did so much for that fish including purchasing things to clean its tank, and it just basically pretended to be dead every day, floating around the top of the bowl until one of us started having the is-it-appropriate-to-flush-someone-else’s-fish-or-do-you-keep-it-for-some-kind-of-memorial conversation within ear shot of the fish. Then it sort of rolled over in a very non-committed to life sort of way and stared at us. Ungrateful.


Luckily, the kids have not asked for a fish. Wren was more upset about the idea that Fillmore was not hers simply because that meant he belonged to someone else, and she has not been okay with anything not belonging solely to her this week. It’s a fun new phase we’re getting through. Anyway, if you ever need somebody to fish sit for you, we will. However, I beg you to consider the mental anguish your fish may suffer in our presence. Is it really fair to the fish?

Wednesday Update

I’m writing because I need to write, but focus has not been my thing lately. Here comes the randomness:


We’re going to the fair tomorrow, and I’m excited! The kids have never been and Dennis and I have never been together, so this should be a new experience for us all in a way. I used to make my way around the fair with a corny dog in one hand and a funnel cake in the other. That will not be an option this time, but I’m very okay with that.

Graduate school is going well, so of course I feel I should probably be more panicked. My laid back attitude is nice and has managed to keep me both not crazy and doing well in my class, but I’m so not accustomed to not having school consume my brain like a black hole that the peace is kind of weird. Which is weird in itself. Weird.

Wren and Sammy are sleeping in their own beds. I take zero credit for this awesomeness, but I am so very happy about it. I love co-sleeping and will do it again if we have more kids, but this new phase is equally great in a whole different way. I remembered this week that I love spreading out to sleep. And I like to cuddle with the hubs. And I like people not laying on my head when I sleep. Plus, there’s the bonus of believing if anyone starts puking, I may not be the second person hit by it (D is always the first one hit because he refuses to wake up quickly when I scream “that’s a puke cough”, or he wakes up and argues that it’s not a puke cough right until someone pukes on him. I take cover.)

I’m not thinking about food as much so I am actually having less issues with sugar cravings. Go figure! When I try to count how many grams of devil sugar have entered my body, I go nuts and find myself eating something atrocious and then beating myself up for two days. When I don’t think about it, I take one swig of Dennis’ gluten-free, caffeine-free, weirdly delicious root beer and stop at that. Then I burp and that’s good enough.


The Old Testament has been a bit rough to be immersed in, so I am thinking about combining some New Testament with it. There are so many good things in the Old Testament, and I do feel like I’m learning more about who God is and how He operates. But not fully understanding that particular time in the world makes some of the reading refuse to mesh with my current understanding of Christ and now and my own very narrow perception of how things work. So I’m pushing through the Old Testament(currently in Joshua), but I may start reading through the New Testament simultaneously. It’s a good idea to brush up on Jesus’ birth this time of year anyway before our soul-sucking materialistic world completely kills the true meaning of Christmas before it’s even the end of October!

Ta ta for now.