Thursday, January 3, 2013

Things You Didn’t Know

I fear sometimes reading the blog that we come off a little high maintenance and crazy. We are crazy, but the high maintenance part isn’t really accurate. Sure, the Celiac, pneumonia, momo pregnancy doesn’t paint the strongest picture of laid back ease, but our lives are actually fairly simple with tons to be thankful for. I thought in honor of that I would share a few things that might normalize us. After reading the list, I realize that plan might not have worked.

Dennis makes me laugh everyday.

Sammy likes to call himself Sammy Wa-Wa and say “shake your booty, shake your booty” while performing in the living room.

Wren decided since we had all been sick and she had been taking care of us that it was her turn. She gave Sammy a brush today and told him to do her hair because it was taking care of Wren time. She said it with such confidence that Sammy didn’t even question her.

The first thing my husband said to me after our sonogram confirming the twins are mono-mono was, “You have really hairy arms, and I never noticed before now.”

I have two children, have carried them for a total of 84 weeks (yeah, that's way more than most elephants) and still never dilated. My cervix is apparently defective, or I can just get them in there easily but not out.

My husband puts the kids to bed every night. I love him for this and many other reasons.

Both Dennis and I are halfway through our Master’s degrees. Our choice to procreate frequently is why we’re only halfway through.

I have no sense of smell, but Wren can smell a gnat fart in the next county. When we are at the grocery store she frequently likes to scream, “Mom, did you fart or did Sammy fart? It stinks in here.” Yeah, it’s as awesome at it sounds.

Someone hacked my Pinterest account. True story, and I still don’t understand why.

Sammy forgot he was weaned in November, so he totally made a pass at the boob while sick last week. Upon being rejected due to lack of milk, he just started begging, “please,please”. I kind of think he may be a boob man (and if I wasn’t supporting a small army of children in my womb I would have just let him latch back on).

Tamiflu is the first antibiotic I’ve taken in five years because I just drink water and take supplements when I start feeling sick. That did not work this time.

I can eat more gluten-free Twisted Root burgers in one sitting than most anyone. I am kind of a legend like that, and everyone at the location closest to our house knows me and my order when I walk in.

Now I’m hungry for a burger.

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